Even if you’re one for having tough and soulful conversations with your partner, bringing up new things you’d want to try in your sex life can feel awkward sometimes. You know that talking openly and honestly is super important for a happy relationship – and that means tackling that subject, too. If you’re longing for some extra vibration in your bedroom but find it a bit difficult to talk it through, here are some tips that might inspire you.
Why Talking About Trying Sex Toys Together Is Important?
Discussing your fantasies helps build trust and intimacy in your relationship. Shame-free and open conversation about your desires and boundaries helps you better understand each other’s needs, wants, bedroom expectations, and what you can do to meet them.
It also makes your sex life a heck of more enjoyable and exciting because as long as you keep surprising each other and metaphorically high-fiving each other in orgasms, your relationship will last, and will feel fresh and secure and wonderful. as exploring new things together can strengthen your connection and keep your relationship fresh. Plus, talking about sex toys and consequently trying them together breaks down stigma or embarrassment, making you feel more confident in your body and your sexuality.
No matter if you are using toys alone but haven’t introduced them to your lover yet or haven’t used toys at all but the idea appeals to you – communicate.
8 Steps To Starting The Sex Toy Talk
Remember – these are just some conversation staters and talking points to help you out, not concrete guidelines you have to follow. Ultimately, this conversation has to be about your and your partner’s comfort and desires.
- Find The Right Moment
Pick a time when both of you are relaxed and not preoccupied with something else. Maybe during a quiet evening at home, over a drink, or while cuddling after a shower or a movie night. The key is to make sure you’re both calm and connected.
- Start With The Positive Stuff
Kick off the conversation by saying something nice about your partner – some people might take the sex toy talk the wrong way and feel as if they are not enough in bed. Which, of course, cannot be further from the truth.
For example, tell your partner how much you enjoy your sexy time together and how you’d like to make it even better. You could say something like, “I love our moments together, and I have been thinking about how we can make it a little bit more exciting.”
- Explain Your Fantasy
Be honest about why you want to try a vibrator. Share your excitement and curiosity. Tell them you want to find out how it feels together or say something along the lines of “I’ve been fantasizing about you using it on me”.
- Listen To Their Concerns (If There Are Any)
Your partner might have questions or worries, which are totally understandable and which you can soothe right them and there. Be sincere, listen, and reassure them. Let them know that your interest in a vibrator isn’t because you’re unhappy but because you’re curious.
- Suggest Exploring Together
Invite your partner to shop around together. Look at vibrators online, browse, talk about all the ways any particular oy can make you feel, read reviews, and fantasize together. It can be a pretty steamy experience on its own.
- Highlight The Fun
Talk about the potential benefits of using a vibrator. Explain how it can make things more pleasurable, more fun, and more recurring – if you know what I mean. Statistically, almost 90% of women need clitoral stimulation to finish, and a vibrator can help massively with that. Not to mention that, thanks to the vibrator’s power and frequency, it usually needs less time to arouse a woman, make her wet, cutting foreplay time and going straight to the main course. Vibrators also help men last longer and give both lovers sensations that are impossible otherwise – and that is something to consider.
- Respect Their Feelings
Give your partner space and time to think about it. They might not be in right away, and that’s okay. Encourage them to share what they’re feeling. If they’re on the fence, suggest trying it once to see how it goes.
- Keep Talking
Such a conversation shouldn’t be a one-time occurrence. After you speak on it for the first time, raise this topic again to discuss how everyone feels and what could have been done better. Don’t forget to laugh – because sex is fun, and it should invite lighthearted attitudes.
How To Introduce Vibrators Into Your Relationship And Enjoy Together
Even though talking about using a sex toy in bed might be a bit nerve-wracking, it is worth it and is bound to lead to more intimacy, more quality time, and simply more fun. By choosing the right moment, being honest, and addressing concerns with love and care, you’ll have no other way but to the orgasmtown!
